Simple thoughts of destruction

I am worn out and I feel like I am having a sinus episode which is a combination of a sinus headache and double vision. Joyful. Last night Cindy cut off the airconditioning and I kept waking up and feeling unbelivably hot. I feel out of control. Cindy, never mind. Everyone is selfish, sinful. Kate probably doesn't believe in sin at this point. Maybe the one thing I do believe in all the time. I am on the verge of being out of control again. There is so much to do and everyone wants to blame me for the troubles. Out of control. I can't even make a poem about Molly which works. I wish I could sleep through the night tonight. But I have no control over that. I am afloat on a river covered with efluvia. Like the Tennessee River south of Knoxville. I yearn for Lake Norris, so clean and so cool. Lake Norris in my life.