Postscript

My mother might say, "Pick it up and put it in the trashcan."

My father might say, "I think you all are lazy."

And they both might be right.

But I'm not moving it.

Now we are arguing as to how long the bottle of Dasani has been sitting on the table. Very reminiscent of the argument in the 19th century as to the actual age of the earth. Thus, almost anything in this universe has a theological aspect and a scientific aspect. Too bad we feel compelled to require them to face against one another, rather than as some giant bust of Janus, with two aspects branching off of one head, facing in opposite directions. Or some many-headed hydra from Greek mythology. If your impression is more agressive than merely classical.