Double, double standards, part deux

I agree that we have problems and need to work on them. I am afraid that our problems are deeper than we think and go beyond any problems we have with each other. I love you and I love Kate. Kate and I don't conspire against you. At least we don't conspire consciously.

To a certain degree you have always treated Kate like your mother treats you. You have tried to control the way she thinks about things and have second-guessed her in a lot of the choices she makes. I, on the other hand have tried to treat Kate like my buddy. In addition, I have realized that when Kate made the decision to go away for college she would individuate, get into some things that neither you nor I would appreciate, and end up seeming to be at cross purposes to you and me. On the other hand, I know that Kate is not really going to stray far from you or me. I have seen a lot of you in her over the past few months. That can be frustrating at times. But most of the time I am glad she takes after her mother.

I get frustrated with Kate when she treats me like I am the child and she is the parent. I get frustrated with you when you do that too. I have been on the receiving end of a lot of faint praise over the last few months. It came from attorneys, judges and people I love.

As you know, I have been battling depression for the past year or so. It may have been longer. I don't really have any good friends anymore. Part of that is my fault. When Bob Bugg called me the other day, that was the first contact with a male friend I had had for several years. I don't feel like I have the opportunity to develop any friendships. This extends from my friends from college who used to be very close to my adult friends now. Add to this the fact that I have even lost some of my male friends, like David Finney and Ken Smith, and life is tough. No doubt.

I apologize for the stress I have put on you in trying to deal with my depression. I apologize for the stress I have put you through because of my struggles with my business. I am sorry for the stress that my family puts you through from time to time.

It hasn't always been a bad trip. A trip to Prague, an afternoon in Atlanta, a holiday in Florida at Thanksgiving. Uncle David said at our rehearsal dinner to look at the doughnut and not at the hole. Sage advice.