Secrets and Miracles

When Cindy and I were first married, I think both of us wanted a medium sized family, maybe three children, just like what we had when we were both children. Unfortunately, those plans did not come to fruition, but we have one very special little girl, who has passed on into womanhood and is on the verge of being on her own. We couldn't do any better than Kate and I am very happy she is my daughter and very proud.

When Cindy and I were first married, as I said, we thought we would have a larger family. Within a year of our wedding, Cindy had to go into the hospital for surgery. At the end of her outpatient surgery, the doctor told us that Cindy might thereafter have problems with having babies. I can remember hearing those words and not really allowing them to sink into my consciousness. I was confident that that would not be the case.

Several years later, Kate came into the world. I can remember standing at the head of the operating table, holding Cindy's hands, and watching as the doctor took Kate and passed her over to the attending nurse. The nurse cleaned her off, wrapped her in a warm blanket and placed the package in my arms. I remember her ice blue eyes staring unblinkingly out of the blanket and her perfect little round face. I guess everybody feels this way, but she seemed like she was the perfect baby. No wrinkles, a little puffy, all of her toes and fingers, a little red fringe on top of her head. She didn't even cry.

Later, they took her from me to check her out and they graded her out a 10 on the apgar scale, just a perfect little person. I ran out through the halls of the obstetrics wing into the waiting area outside and almost ran over my mother and mother in law waiting outside the door. I was so excited that I went to the payphone and called everyone I knew, waking up quite a few of them, it being after 1:00 o'clock a.m. on a Friday morning by the time I was able to call. Nobody seemed to mind.

After they relocated Cindy to one of the patients' rooms, I finally went home to my parents' house and slept for a couple of hours. The next morning, I awoke, ate a quick, small breakfast and drove to Perimeter Mall to buy a little bear for Kate, thinking that a bigger bear might frighten her. Later that morning, I drove to the hospital and bought some flowers for Cindy and arrived in the hospital delivery ward.

I stopped and checked on Cindy and then trotted down to the nursery to see if I could catch a glimpse of Kate. This was fairly easy, since Kate was the only one holding her head up from her bassinet, looking around the room. As my father-in-law said, she was 'exceptional'.

As she grew older, she became more and more special to me. I couldn't help but wonder what the next one would be like.

But the years went by and no more siblings were born. Time dragged on and we began to lose the confidence that we would have a big family. We wondered just what God had in store.

Several years later, Cindy, Kate and I were visiting Cindy's parents in California. One afternoon, Cindy, her mother, Kate and I were wandering around a department store. As the ladies looked for outfits and dresses, I followed Kate as she toddled around, touching the fabric. As my wife and mother-in-law wandered semi-consciously through the multiplicity of dresses their attentions focused on the wares, I kept a step behind the kid. Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I noticed an older gentleman lurking nearby. Something about his bearing caught my eye. I immediately noticed that he had focused his gaze on Kate.

Suddenly, he took a cautious step closer to Kate. As he did so, I interposed my body between Kate and his line of sight. Without a word or a glance at me, he suddenly turned and beat a path out of the ladies' dress department. I grabbed Kate and watched his back as it disappeared through the store. I wondered how close we had come to losing the kid.

Without a doubt that was the most anxious moment I have ever had concerning Kate. As time has worn on, I have come to realize that Kate has always been our little miracle. I don't know what might have happened if I had not been aware of the stalker's presence in the department store, but I am glad I was able to preserve our little miracle.